Life with Logan

 

(Logan after his first day of school yesterday!)

I’ve been wanting to write for a while but just haven’t found the time.

Logan is 8 weeks today.  Where does the time go?  He is beyond precious.  I love every minute of having him in this world.  I never knew I could have so much love for another child besides Liam. 

Logan has been a great baby.  He is really easy going and only cries when he’s hungry, tired or has gas.  He is an amazing sleeper.  He normally sleeps 4 hours to start, but we’ve gotten a few 5 hours and even a 7 hour stretch to start.  Last night he was in bed at 10, up at 2 to eat and then up at 7.  This is completely different from how Liam slept.  I think because Liam was such a difficult sleeper I’m appreciating Logan’s sleep habits so much more!

My favorite moment with Logan so far is when I nurse him.  When he looks up at me while feeding is pure bliss.  I am just cherishing those moments with him.  He and I have such an amazing bond.  I know all too well how quickly it goes. 

My first day back to work was yesterday.  It was hard, really hard.  I remember it being hard with Liam but not this hard.  Dropping Logan off at school was difficult but I know I needed to do it.  I needed to be sure everything was in its place.  Saying goodbye was so tough.  To think he has physically been with me since January when we conceived him and now I’m going to be apart from him for longer than 2 hours.  I cried a lot.  I just wanted to get out of there and let it out but Liam wanted to say goodbye to me.  I gave him a quick hug and left.  I needed to be alone and let all these emotions out.

It was good to be back at work as I do love my job.  But I also love my time with Logan.  His school is less than 5 minutes from my work so I went to see him at lunch to nurse him.  It made the day go by faster.  I sure was happy to pick him up at the end of the day.  I know it will get easier.  I did it with Liam, I can do it with Logan.  And I know for myself I need the mental stimulation at work.  And Liam is thriving at school and I want the same for Logan.  For now, one day at a time.

I still need to write up Logan’s birth story.  Despite 21 hours of labor, I would do it all again in a heartbeat for him.  It’s true in that they say you forget all the pain once your child is born. 

I wish you all a very happy Thanksgiving.  We have so much to be thankful for this year.

Sweetpea is here!

Just a short note to say Logan Michael arrived on Tuesday, October 1st at 3pm.  He weighed in at 6lb 12.5 oz and 20.5 inches long.  He is perfect.  Despite 21 hours of labor and multiple fears of having another c-section has his heart rate was dropping, I was able to have the VBAC I so wanted. I cried when he came out.  I had done it!  And what an amazing feeling it was.

We have been home since Thursday.  Sleeping is challenging but I must remember he isn't even a week old yet.  I love this little guy so much and am so blessed.

39 Weeks

I have to say these past 2-3 weeks have been really long.  This pregnancy has gone by fast but the past few are dragging.  I think it’s because I just want him here so badly right now.  I’ve never been a real patient person but I can say right now I’m getting really impatient!

I went to the hospital on Monday to have the ECV to get him to flip to head down. Well we got the best news we could possibly ask for.  They did an ultrasound when I got there and sure enough he flipped on his own!  I was so thankful he had done it.  But at the same time I asked him why he was causing Mommy so much stress!

My hubby and I had the rest of the day to ourselves so we went home and watched a movie.  It was so nice just to be the two of us and do something we haven’t done in a while.  I really cherished those few hours of just us as I know once Sweetpea comes things will get hectic.

I had my 39 week appointment this morning.  Still 2cm dilated and 60% effaced.  Though the good news is his head is still down!  It’s not engaged yet but at least it’s down!  She did ask if I wanted my membranes stripped and I told her to do so.  I will do anything right now to get things moving along!  It hurt but felt it was worth it to potentially allow me to meet my little boy in the near future.  I was measuring 38 weeks which is great as I was always measuring 2-3 weeks ahead with Liam.  Sweetpea is going to be a normal size baby and that makes me confident I can do this VBAC that I so want.

So I continue to wait in hopes of meeting my precious little boy very soon!!

Challenges

I’m trying to remind myself that God doesn’t give us anything we can’t handle.  I must remember that.

I lost my bloody show last night and was having some menstrual like cramps most of the night.  Our 38 week appointment was scheduled for tomorrow but I wanted to go today to see what was going on.  Well I was 2cm and 60% effaced which was progress.  Then he couldn’t seem to find his head so said we should do an ultrasound.  And what did we find; Sweetpea had rotated and now was in a breech position.  He was fine on Friday.  It’s interesting because last night there was a hard spot and I kept poking it and normally he would move but he didn’t.  Now I know it was because it was his head and not as easy to move as a leg or foot.

I’ve been really positive these past few weeks that I WILL have a VBAC.  It’s something I want so badly after having a c-section.  I’m not going to lie but this news put a damper on those positive thoughts.  I know there is time to move and room to move as he did it.  But what if he doesn’t?  We are giving him till Monday to do it on his own.  If he doesn’t then I will go into the hospital on Monday to have our doctor do it.  I trust him completely but wonder what if it doesn’t work.  That means another c-section and I really don’t want to have one.  This is my last shot at experiencing a vaginal birth.  Positive thoughts.  Positive thoughts.

37 Weeks Today

Today marks 37 weeks and technically full term!  Now he can come whenever.  I did have a few freak out moments he was going to come early (the one day I spotted and when I was having contractions on strong pain meds), but now I’m comfortable with him coming out whenever he is ready.  Sooner rather than later would be great because I want to see his face so badly.  And it’s honestly all I can think about these days of me going into labor.  I so want to experience that on my own.  I want my body to do what it’s supposed to do.

The exhaustion is really bad right now.  Trying to work full time and get a bunch of last minute items done there has not been an easy task this week.  All I want to do is sleep.  Even some coffee isn’t helping the situation.  I know the end is near and I’m trying to get through it but it’s tough. 

Oh and I’m sick again, battling a cold this time around complete with a sore throat and a stuffy nose.  Thankfully no coughing but I’m so sick of being sick.  I know it’s the change in weather we’ve been having.  Today is supposed to be 90, Friday is supposed to be 60.  Got to love VT weather!

Holy Hormones

I never thought a bad pedicure would make me cry.  Well at 36 weeks pregnant I guess it can do that to you.

I’ve been looking forward to a pedicure all week.  I figured it would be my last one before Sweetpea arrives so was having high hopes about it.  I went to the same place I’ve been going to for the past 3 years or so.

Well it was not wonderful.  There was a girl there before me who was probably 1/3 through her pedicure and we ended up leaving at the same time.  Yes, the girl that did mine went way too fast.  I would understand if they had a line of people but there wasn’t.  It was just me and the other girl getting pedicures.  Normally you get a foot and calf massage.  Well she never even massages my feet, just my calves.  My feet are carrying 30 extra pounds of weight right now; I really could have used it.  She barely took all the dead skin of the bottom of my feet.  It looks like a 2 year old did it.  And one of my toenails starting hurting when she was trying to shape it.  I shouldn’t have given her any tip.  She wasn’t worth the $1 I gave her.

It’s not the end of the world right?  We all get bad pedicures every now and then right?  I just wanted a good one so badly.  My body needed one.  I’m 36 weeks pregnant.  I’m so tired as I’m barely sleeping.   I just wanted one 30-45 minutes of pampering. 

I will get over it.  But for now, I guess I will let myself cry. 

On another note, we got to see Sweetpea yesterday and were finally able to get a really cute profile shot of him.  He is quite cute!  And I was so happy to hear that he is a normal size baby!  He is in the 51% percentile and approximately 6lb 4 oz.  Liam at this stage was in the 90% percentile and approximately 7lb 9oz.  Knowing Sweetpea is a normal size gives me hope that I can do a VBAC.  I want to more than anything.  I know it’s going to hurt badly but I want to experience it.  I haven’t dilated yet and he hasn’t engaged into my pelvis yet but it’s still early.   Whenever he is ready, I can’t wait to meet him!

29 Days Left

The past 4 weeks have been crazy, at least health wise.  My husband came down with pneumonia so was out of commission for a week.  I had to step it up to take care of the house and Liam.  Let’s just say I was exhausted and going to bed once Liam was in bed.

Then I started coughing.  I was afraid it was pneumonia but got checked out and was fine.  The second week of coughing I started really getting sore on my right side.  Well last Saturday night (24^th) I was sitting on the couch relaxing and coughed.  The coughed triggered a serious pain in my right side.  I’m normally one to deal with pain but this was different.  I thought; I will just go to bed.  So I headed upstairs.  Well the thought of lying on my side with this pain made me cry.  Something wasn’t right.  My husband took me to the hospital and we were able to get right in (they sent me to labor and delivery).  They thought it was either a pulled muscle or a cracked rib.  They gave me some pain meds to ease the pain.  Let’s just say coughing before the pain meds was excruciating.  We got home at 11:30 that night.  I took last week to rest a lot, taking naps during the day up to 2 hours at a time.  I did work some half days but that was about all I could manage.  While I was on the pain meds I was getting a lot of contractions, though thankfully they stopped once I stopped the pain meds.

My side definitely still hurts.  I can feel it but it’s something I can deal with and tolerate.  I’m trying my best not to take any Tylenol at this point. I still am extremely tired but am sure that is also just part of being 36 weeks pregnant.

I’ve been crazy at making sure I have everything packed for Sweetpea and for my hospital bag.  I just don’t know when the time is going to come and I’m one that likes to be prepared.  I’m so excited to see his face.  I am ready physically and emotionally to meet this little guy.  I’m definitely not looking forward to sleepless nights but can’t wait to finally have him in my arms.  And I am so excited to share his name!

I have a 36 week appointment on Thursday.  We will have an ultrasound to check on how big he is.  One this is I do think he might have dropped in these past few days because walking as gotten a lot more uncomfortable and I’ve slowed down.  I’ve always been a really fast walker but could really tell the difference in my pace this weekend.  Maybe that’s a good sign that I can have a VBAC!  I’m remaining positive that I can do it.  I WANT to do it.