It’s has been rough for me these past few months ever since losing my two angels. I’ve been clinging to anything stable right now. I got some bad news this morning.
To give some back story first, I’ve struggled with bosses. I am a very easy person to get along with but every boss I have had has not respected me and valued me for me. They have all treated me like crap. The last job I left because of my boss. I figured my breaking point was when I took my lunch breaks to go cry in the Wal-Mart parking lot close by. He in essence was emotionally abusing me. I recently was able to talk to the women who took my place and she had the same issues with him. She said I could have sued for a hostile working environment because it really was that bad. They finally got a new HR person and fired him. It’s about time.
I felt so blessed to finally have a wonderful boss in my current job. He treats me with the respect that I deserve. We work well together and able to bounce ideas off each other. After dealing with all my other bosses, he was a breath of fresh air. Well I got news today that his job is being eliminated. You don’t understand how much that devastates me. He has till the end of March and then he is done. I seriously don’t know how I’m going to handle this change. I can’t deal with another change.
So the question arises, God, how much can I handle? How much crap are you going to send my way? I’m about to break. The anxiety is back in full force today just thinking of my boss not being here anymore. Why do I have to go through all this shit? To some losing a boss might not be a big deal but after what I’ve been though, especially my last boss, this is bad. I’m scared of what is going to happen when he leaves. I can’t deal with more unknowns. I’m just not sure if I can handle this on top of everything else on my own.
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