8 Weeks

I made it through another week. Time is moving so slowly it seems like.


I’m trying to take one day at a time though it can be really hard. I want to know this baby is ok. I want to love this baby but am scared. I’m so afraid to get attached and then get my heartbroken. I haven’t talked to this baby much yet (I remember I did a lot with Liam). I feel like a horrible mother for doing so. But at the same time, I feel if I do, I’m going to be even more connected to this little person. And then the thought of potentially losing him/her? I can’t do it. I really want to be positive. I really do. But it’s hard to do so after what we’ve been through.

If this baby sticks, it’s our last. We are done at two. Remembering that makes me want to appreciate every second of this pregnancy. But it’s so hard when you don’t know if this baby is ok or not.

We told my husband’s mother on Friday that we are pregnant. That was another big step for us. Telling anyone at this point is a big step (and to date only 4 people know, and of course all you blogging ladies).

On a very positive note, I still feel gross. It’s all day kind feeling. Still haven’t gotten sick yet though. I’m still eating every few hours and trying to manage this horrible taste in my mouth. I feel like my belly is growing already too. From what I’ve heard you show a lot faster the second time around. I’ve had a little cramping here and there which I’m taking as my uterus expanding. I’m praying all of these are positive signs.

Less than a week until we see this little person. I’m hoping at that point I can start to breathe a little bit.